Bullshit E-mail!

Over half the e-mails I get are either stupid junkmail, hatemail or retarded forwards from idiots who I don't like and/or don't know. Normally I just delete them but I was bored so I thought I'd see if the stories of the e-mail forward shittyness was all what it was said to be. I scrolled down for 5 minutes because 8 zillion people actually keep forwarding them. And when I got to it, it was written by a 3 year old handicap who wrote about "Here are a few reasons why guys like girls." My first thought was how does a handi cap know how to type let alone know why guys like girls. I'm a guy, so I wanted to see why I like girls. And here are the reasons, along with my comments:

1. They will always smell good even if its just shampoo

Every single girl will smell good? Bullcrap. I bet there are gillions of tsuanmi girls who smell like rotting vomit.

2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder

I hate when girls rest there head on my shoulder. I find it rather uncomfortable. And I have no doubt that it's uncomfortable for them too. A shoulder is a big bone. How comfortable can that be.

3. How cute they look when they sleep

Who looks at there girl when she sleeps?

4. The ease in which they fit into our arms

Did I read something wrong or is this girl reffering to herself as a man in each of these.

5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world

Untel you realize you're kissing another slut full of stds and gives you crabs.

6. How cute they are when they eat

Are you kidding me. Unless she's eating my smelly jissims, no girl looks "cute" eating.

7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while

How does it make it all worth while? She just took hours to get DRESSED! Now it's going to take you even longer to finally get her back undressed.

8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside

Always warm after I give her my coat and I'm freezing my ass off. Yeah that's sure special. Good job your warm, my balls are chizzling off.

9. The way they look good no matter what they wear

Maybe if your dating a super model. Even then i'm sure you could find something to make them look ugly. That's bull crap, this e-mail is giving girls way to much credit.

10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful thing on this earth

Self CONCEITED bitch.

11. How cute they are when they argue

...

12. The way her hand always finds yours

Ohh yay. How about her hand stops finding my hand, and starts finding Mr Willy.

13. The way they smile

THAT IS NO REASON TO LIKE A GIRL. I JUST WANT TO FUCKING KNOCK DFOSDFLSDFS

14. The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight

What the fuckity fucking shit!?!?!

15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later

Hmm? What the hell does that mean..

16. The way they kiss when you do something nice for them

The only reason a guy does something nice for a girl is because he's horny and wants sex. Every single guy just wants sex. He will do what ever he can to get it. Every guy JUST WANTS SEX.